Spyke and Mike

Bike Night Ballyhoo!

It's July and already hotter than a $2 pistol, my BTR friends. I keep telling Mike to hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. He keeps telling me his arms are hurting from too many 12 oz curls, his fingers are pruned from holding too many wet cans, and his brain is too foggy from multiple run-ins with Bud, Foster, Stella, Amber and Genny. Bert’s Great American Bike Night at OCC Roadhouse & Museum has been off the chain. Lately there have been two bands and me on stage with at least one of them, a variety of vendors, awesome food choices, and plenty…
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Great American Bike Night at OCC Road House – Meet Paul Teutul Sr. along with Spyke and Mike

We’re right smack dab in the middle of it, my Born To Ride friends. I'm not just referring to the afternoon showers and intense heat/humidity of June, but the OCC Roadhouse and museum. They are the latest and greatest group to join the Born To Ride family and we are the latest and greatest group to be pitching a 10 x 10 tent at their Great American Bike Night on Thursday. You'll find me on the Fat Bird 3 under the tent supporting the festivities at one of the biggest and baddest biker Meccas on the west coast of Florida.…
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LOOKIN’ BACK AT ROADS TRAVELED

With the coming of May we're coming into Love Bug season my BTR friends. A time when bugs between the teeth can only mean you're smiling way too much when on two wheels. Except in my case, they just leave juice behind as they disintegrate bouncing off my aerodynamic beak! Mike belches out, “Yeah little buddy, over the past few years there hasn't been enough bugs between my teeth, until recently. Now I can't seem to get my fair share of ‘em and you definitely don't see enough bugs bouncing off your beak either. Lately I've found you sitting for…
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All Florida Guidelines – Spyke and Mike

Spring has sprung my BTR friends. So has the influx of retirees, Canadians, and Yankees moving south. Last month I gave out-of-staters the red flags about sightseeing here. For those who are not easily scared by my typing talons and are ready to make a change in their home address, this month I’m giving you the A.F.G’s (All Florida Guidelines) about what to expect living here and what we expect of you becoming a Sunshine State citizen. Mike breaks in, “You tell ‘em my avian encyclopedia of the Floridian lifestyle. They just don’t seem to understand my mortal interactions, profanities…
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WARNING! Don’t Move to Florida!

Hey there, my Born To Ride friends. Mother Nature blessed us with great riding weather for Thunder by the Bay and Charlotte's Web Mardi Gras parties. Human Nature overwhelmed us with great friends, old and new, for both events. The traffic on I-75 was brutal both weekends and riding on Mike’s shoulder or the backrest of the Fat Bird 3 wasn’t helping the situation. Between the rubbernecking, people speeding up and slowing down to take pictures or just honking and waving, was almost overwhelming for Mike. A lot of those vehicles had out-of-state tags. Believe it when I say a…
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Gearin’ up for a Greasy Good Time

Oh my God! The year 2022 is turning into a crap show. Not because Mike isn’t maintaining his resolutions, but now we're getting milk from plants. They're trying to do away with my second-best farm animal friend, the cow. I have a real beef with a company out of Israel called Remilk that makes animal-free dairy proteins out of precise fermentation. It's udderly ridiculous and sounds like the start of a good wine to me. But what do I know, I'm just a bird who opens beers, then eats beef, bread, french fries, pork chops and chicken wings. I'm not…
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Spyke & Mike: A New Year’s Cackle

Hey there my BTR friends. Welcome to 2022. Time for Mike and I to make yearly resolutions which we really try to keep. I must say though, Mike sets his sights pretty high to spend less, waste less time, and eat less. He usually shoots himself in the foot late January or early February. Me, on the other hand, go for the little things that I can stick to like: not complaining about the amount of nuts he gives me, not squawking loudly scaring my fans, and not pooping on the Fat Bird when he takes me out for a…
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Spyke & Mike’s Spiked Holiday Hangover

“Ho, ho, ho, booms the fat man or as I cackle; hobble, wobble, and gobble my BTR friends. It's that time of year to head over the river and through the woods to be around people so dear, near, and hopefully full of cheer. Or in my case, at the Sanctuary, have Mike clean up the extra rooms and pull out the air mattresses so my relatives can come and visit.”   Mike replies, “Bird brain, did you email holiday invitations behind my back again this year? I may be the guardian of the sanctuary but I'm not going to…
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Turkey Day Delirium

We’re into that frightful fourth Thursday month my BTR friends. Even though it’s only one day, the preceding weeks are scary times for me and my cousins. November is synonymous for many things; cooler weather, breaking out the riding leathers, the start of snowbird season and that dreaded turkey day known to you humans as Thanksgiving. You're not going to get any thanks from me or my feathered family. The changing of the leaves lets us know that it’s time for the chopping of the heads that we all have nightmares about. There’s nothing worse for us fowl than to…
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Bad Day At The Quickie Mart

Hey, hey, my BTR friends. I was just chatting with Mike, hanging out in the sanctuary at Paradise, watching the birds fly over the Lanai and wondering if they really get any enjoyment out of all that flapping. A few months ago he took me to the beach to practice my hanging eight in the surf and try flying in the Gulf breeze. I’ve been surfing for a while and getting pretty good at it but, the flying part is for the birds. I kept crash landing and getting a beak full of sand. I just don’t know why they…
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Squawk on the Wild Side – Spyke & Mike

Holy crap my BTR friends, it's still hotter than donut grease at a fat man's convention! When Mike makes me poop and it hits the sidewalk in the sun, those turds just sizzle like carnival elephant ears! September used to be the start of cooler weather, but I don't think Mother Nature sees it that way. Undoubtedly for the past decade, she's been disregarding the Labor Day weekend/end-of-summer ritual by staying on an extra-long vacation in Hades. Of course some are blaming the exceptionally hot days and global warming on the release of greenhouse gases and raising the sea level.…
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Spyke and Mike – the Great American Motofest

The heat is on, my Born To Ride friends. Last month we kicked the season in gear and now we’re winding up for the dog days of summer. Why do they call them dog days anyways? Why not bird bath days? Canines are like me and don’t want to be out in the hot sun unless it’s in the water or under some shade. Mike breaks in, “I get it, you gain total relief from the heat during your daily shower that usually occurs naturally in the middle of summer. In your case, it’s when the waterfall comes to life…
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Biker Rodeo Grand Marshalls, Spyke & Mike

Happy love bug season, my BTR friends. It's a good time to be sportin' a windscreen. If you ride the kind of scoot that's too cool for one, then you should be wearing a mask or full face helmet. It will keep you from having those pesky, mating, flying insects between your teeth, or worse, up your nose. Also consider yourself lucky riding in Florida 'cuz from Georgia northward, they've got to put up with bigger swarms of cicadas, Japanese beetles, and other flying June bugs. All of which aren't very tasty and can really sting when hitting you in…
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Spyke and Mike – There is light at the end of the tunnel

Whatttsup my BTR friends? Mike and I hope all is well in your neck of the woods as we make the best of it in ours. He repeats to me daily the age old proverb: There is light at the end of the tunnel. With all the life-altering events that have happened recently, most of you would think he's referring to COVID or social injustice situations. But in our case, it's the results of a catastrophic accident that occurred to us on June 22, 2019 while riding the Fat Bird 2. In a nutshell (using this term wisely) he was…
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SPRING HAS SPRUNG!

It’s springtime in Florida and we’re feeling the full effects my BTR friends. The pollen covers everything with a green haze and makes everyone sneeze a lot. The spring breakers acting stupid at the beach makes the locals green with disdain. Mike boils eggs way too long and turns the yolks green that makes for funny looking deviled eggs after losing the Easter egg cracking contest down at our local pub. Speaking of eggs, it’s that season for me to pop out a few. Mike cuts me off saying, “for the past few years I’ve been forgetting about your motherly…
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SPYKE & MIKE GO TO THE PET STORE

It's a great time to be living in Florida my Born To Ride friends. As the rest of the country is shut down either from snow, freezing temperatures, or creeping corona virus, we here in Florida are enjoying a fairly open for business state with warm weather, outdoor events and live music on a limited but regular basis. Most recently, the Gibtown and Sarasota Bikefests are now a memory of good times. Many Kodak moments were made with new and old friends. Check it out on the Born To Ride website. All that fun was just getting our partying taste…
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